Skip to main content

Living with Low Self-Esteem: How It Affects Life Even at 42

 


I am 42 this year, and I recently discovered something that my friend warned me about years ago. At the time, I didn’t think much of it, but now, I realize how right they were. They told me, “If you don’t work on your self-esteem while you’re young, it will affect your life later on.”

Well, here I am, 42, living proof of how true that statement is. I’m someone who has struggled with low self-esteem for most of my life, and it still lingers, affecting me in ways that I never imagined when I was younger. It’s not just an abstract feeling that you can ignore—it shows up in the small, everyday moments and, unfortunately, in some of the bigger ones too.

The Daily Struggles of Low Self-Esteem

You might think low self-esteem is just about lacking confidence in social settings, but it’s deeper than that. It can impact your decisions, your relationships, and how you see your own worth. For me, this manifests in several ways:

  • Overthinking: I replay conversations in my head, wondering if I said the wrong thing, if I sounded stupid, or if I annoyed someone.
  • People-Pleasing: I’ve had a hard time saying “no” to people because I fear disappointing them. I find temporary comfort in saying “yes,” but it often leads to resentment later.
  • Avoiding Risks: Whether it’s speaking up in a meeting or trying something new, my mind defaults to What if I fail? or What will people think of me if I mess up?
  • Second-Guessing Myself: Even when I’ve done something well, there’s always a voice in my head telling me it wasn’t good enough.

The Long-Term Impact

When I was younger, I didn’t think much about how these patterns would affect my life down the line. But now, at 42, I see how they’ve shaped so many aspects of who I am and what I do.

I’ve missed out on opportunities because I didn’t believe I was capable. I’ve stayed in situations that didn’t make me happy because I thought I didn’t deserve better. I’ve felt stuck, frustrated, and overwhelmed, wondering why I can’t just be more confident like other people seem to be.

And here’s the thing—this isn’t something that magically disappears as you get older. If anything, the more years that pass, the more you realize how much low self-esteem has held you back.

Working on It (Even Now)

But I’m learning that it’s never too late to work on your self-esteem. I may be 42, but I’m trying to take small steps every day to change how I see myself. It’s not easy, and it won’t happen overnight, but I want to believe that it’s possible.

Some things I’m trying include:

  • Challenging Negative Thoughts: When I catch myself thinking, You’re not good enough, I try to question it. Is that really true, or is it just my self-doubt talking?
  • Setting Boundaries: I’m practicing saying “no” when I need to, without feeling guilty.
  • Celebrating Small Wins: Even if it’s something as simple as speaking up in a conversation or finishing a task I’ve been avoiding, I’m learning to acknowledge my efforts.
  • Being Kinder to Myself: This one is the hardest, but I’m working on treating myself with the same kindness I show to others.

You’re Not Alone

If you’re reading this and you’re struggling with low self-esteem too, I want you to know that you’re not alone. So many of us feel this way, even if we don’t always talk about it.

It’s okay to admit that you’re struggling. It’s okay to feel like you’re a work in progress. And it’s okay to take things one step at a time.

I’m still figuring things out myself, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that self-esteem isn’t something you either have or don’t have—it’s something you can build. And even if it takes years, it’s worth it.

Click at the picture to read more.

 
 

#SelfEsteemJourney
#BuildingConfidence
#MentalHealthAwareness
#OvercomingSelfDoubt
#BeKindToYourself
#SelfWorthMatters
#WorkInProgress
#ConfidenceBoost
#SelfLoveMatters
#PersonalGrowth
#ItGetsBetter
#YouAreNotAlone
#HealingJourney
#EmbraceYourself

Labels

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Unlocking Happiness: Lessons from Don’t Be Sad

 It is from this book, which I really recommend people to read.  Get The book from here  Title: Unlocking Happiness: Lessons from Don’t Be Sad In a world where life’s challenges can often feel overwhelming, Dr. Aaidh ibn Abdullah al-Qarni’s Don’t Be Sad stands as a timeless guide to overcoming sadness and embracing peace. This remarkable book combines profound wisdom with actionable advice, providing readers with tools to navigate difficulties with faith, gratitude, and resilience. Here, we explore the core themes and lessons from Don’t Be Sad —a book that has transformed countless lives and continues to inspire those seeking solace in tough times. 1. Finding Relief in Hardship One of the most uplifting messages in Don’t Be Sad is derived from the Quranic verse: “Verily, with hardship, there is relief.” This simple yet profound statement reminds us that no matter how heavy our burdens may feel, relief is always near. Dr. Al-Qarni emphasizes patience and trust in Go...
Post a Comment
Read more

Finding Self-Confidence Through “Stay the Same”

Finding Self-Confidence Through “Stay the Same”     Growing up, music often became a source of comfort and connection, and one song that truly stood out to me was *"Stay the Same"* by Joey McIntyre. Its lyrics about self-acceptance and self-confidence resonated with me in a way that felt both reassuring and empowering. At its heart, *"Stay the Same"* is a reminder that we don’t need to change who we are to be worthy of love and acceptance—a message that was both profound and comforting, especially as a young person navigating self-doubt and the desire to fit in. The opening line, *"Don’t you ever wish you were someone else,"* is like a gentle wake-up call. It’s so easy to fall into the habit of comparing ourselves to others, wishing for qualities we don’t have or feeling inadequate because of some perceived flaw. As a young person, hearing these words felt like a validation that who I was, as I was, was enough. It’s one of those rare reminders that our val...
Post a Comment
Read more

Life at 40's

 I thought life t 40's will be a walk in the park, but turn out, it ctully become harder and harder.  Embracing the Challenges of Turning 40: A Journey of Growth and Resilience Turning 40 is often seen as a milestone, a time when life is supposed to be settled and stable. However, for many women, this age can bring a unique set of challenges that are often overlooked or misunderstood. Despite societal expectations, the reality of turning 40 can be a complex mix of emotions, uncertainties, and opportunities for growth. The Myth of the "Perfect Life" at 40 Society often paints a picture of the perfect life by the age of 40: a successful career, a happy family, and a clear sense of purpose. But the truth is, many women find themselves facing significant changes and challenges during this time. Whether it's dealing with career transitions, navigating changes in personal relationships, or confronting health issues, the journey can be far from smooth. Career Transitions and...
Post a Comment
Read more